What I miss most about not having family close by is a sense that the past is an open and growing manuscript, expansive and forgiving. When we talk about the past with family, we often find that each of us remembers different aspects of the same experience. Though the difference in memory can sometimes lead to bickering, it's a relief to know that none of us has the sole responsibility for remembering - what we forget can be recalled by someone else. We occasionally learn details we didn't know because we were too young at the time or lived too far away. Family stories can shed a new light on events we think we know. After the conversation, we add the new pieces to our memory. In this way, the past can expand rater than shrink.
Kyoko Mori, Polite Lies
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